John Waters

28
Jun
2008

Hairspray (2007)

Posted by knobbygirl

Overheard somewhere in Hollywood...

"Hey Eddie, it's me, Johnny T...remember when you said I could borrow your fat black lady suit? Well, my career is in a total slump, so I figure I could...what? You're letting Martin Lawrence use if for Big Momma's House 3? Awww, fuck - looks like I'll have to figure out a way to get the studio to pay for one....

03
Apr
2008

Jackass Number Two

Posted by knobbygirl

Divine is no longer the filthiest person alive - that honor now belongs to Partyboy. I won't ruin the surprise, but in a movie in which someone also eats cow shit, there are few things that could be grosser to ingest. Ironically, the ingestion of this substance is the one sequence in either Jackass movie that is censored. Those boys can put toy cars and beer bongs in their ass, take a dump on a dollhouse and let a snake gnaw on their sock puppeted penises, but this is the one thing that goes beyond rated R.

Why are there no more Midnight Movies?

Okay, technically, I know it's pretty darn easy to find a movie playing at midnight. Practically all theaters now offer midnight showings of mainstream movies. But what happened to those fucked up movies that could only be shown at midnight? Movies that make no sense in the daylight - movies that need the dark.

18
Nov
2004

Seed of Chucky

Posted by knobbygirl

As we were sitting in the dark, waiting for the previews to begin, I was put in the position of rationalizing why I felt it was necessary to go see Seed of Chucky on opening weekend. I tried to explain what a big deal it was - that it was like Lord of the Rings. My husband said that was the "most asinine thing I have ever heard you say." (Not as big an insult as you would think - he says that to me all the time. What can I say?

26
Sep
2004

A Dirty Shame

Posted by knobbygirl

Yodeling in the canyon...heard that one before. Whistling in the dark...haven't heard that one, but I could see it. [Is THAT what the TMBG song is about?] But sneezing in the cabbage? Where the fuck did that come from?

23
Jul
2002

Sweet and Lowdown

Posted by knobbygirl

This was the least offensive Woody Allen film that I've seen to date. Understand that I try to keep my Woody Allen viewing to a minimum - I've probably only seen a handful of his films. When I was little, I'm talking eleven and younger, I used to derive all kinds of entertainment from Allen's films. I'd probably seen Bananas a dozen times before the age of ten. But somewhere around puberty, probably around the time that I transitioned from Barbies to bras and from Kirk Cameron to Axl Rose, I totally lost interest in Woody Allen.

06
Aug
2001

Cry-Baby

Posted by knobbygirl

Sublime parody of Jailhouse Rock.

Johnny Depp is Wade 'Cry-Baby' Walker, orphan without a cause. He falls in love with Allison, a good girl who wants to be bad. He fights for Allison and does it in song. When John Waters does a musical, he does it right. Even though all of the singing voices are dubbed, there are some great musical numbers. Cry-Baby's pelvis puts Elvis to shame.

19
Jun
2000

Mondo Trasho

Posted by knobbygirl

Hmmm...I can't decide if it sucked or I loved it...

Reminds me of the dumb crap we made when we were in college, so maybe that means I liked it...and I thought Orpheus in Hollywood was hard to understand...

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