23
May
2000

Hairspray (1988)

Posted by knobbygirl

John Waters made a film that's rated PG. Who could've predicted that?

Hairspray was the first Waters film I saw. I was in 7th grade - young, impressionable, naive (okay, maybe not naive). From that moment on, I was in love. I had no idea what I was in love with, of course, until I had seen more John Waters' films, but there was a glimmer of it in Hairspray. The underlying promise of perversity and depravity to be revealed with each new John Waters' film that I would view.

15
May
2000

Gladiator

Posted by knobbygirl

So how many times do you think Joaquin Phoenix watched Caligula? 5 times? 10 times? 50 times? I would say 100 times, at the very least.

The whole sister/incest thing was pulled directly from Caligula, as was the pussy ass lisp that Commodus affected. (Connie Nielsen (Lucilla) risks being typecasted as an incestuous freak, what with a similar relationship in The Devils Advocate.) On top of that, he was trying to sex up his nephew, did they even have NAMBLA back then? Of course they did! It was called the Senate...

15
May
2000

The Rage: Carrie 2

Posted by knobbygirl

LAME.

90 minutes of lame-ass shit was not worth the 10 minutes of cool shit in this film.

Harpoon through the crotch was cool. Fireplace poker through 2 heads, in one shot, was cool. The chick from American Beauty nose diving into a car was cool. Being shot with a flare gun was almost cool. Everything else in the film was not cool.

28
Apr
2000

Final Destination

Posted by knobbygirl

When they kill someone, they kill the fuck out of them.

Seriously, they kill people like 5 or 6 times. Which is damn cool. And it's gory as hell. There's blood everywhere. So it's another typical teen slasher.

27
Apr
2000

Ready to Rumble

Posted by knobbygirl

I didn't think they could cram so many shit jokes into one film. And I don't mean mere shit humor, I mean fingers up the butt, Port-o-potties exploding, septic tank trucks overturning, people falling into sewers...

This film was dumb as shit (hehehe, I'm funny), but I laughed so hard that my stomach hurt. Any film about wrestling is doomed to be dumb. There is no intelligent way to deal with the subject of 'Professional Wrestling.' (Sorry Sean.)

25
Apr
2000

American Psycho

Posted by knobbygirl

"I absolutely loved it. It reminded me of 'My Fair Lady.' And it was the only movie I've seen that made me want to go out and buy new luggage." -- John Waters on the film "American Psycho."

Hmmmm...I never knew that a naked man, covered in blood, chasing a prostitute with a chainsaw could be so appealing...

23
Feb
2000

Ma Vie En Rose

Posted by knobbygirl

You gotta give it to the French. They know how to jerk the heartstrings.

I can't believe that this film made me cry. Yes, you heard me right - I cried like a fuckin' tiddy baby. And I'm not even ashamed to say so. I really didn't think that it would affect me this much, but to my surprise, it did. I felt sympathetic towards Ludovic, but I also felt sympathy for his family. What would I do if my little boy wanted to be a little girl? I don't know. I really don't.

23
Feb
2000

American History X

Posted by knobbygirl

This movie is fucking harsh.

I finally got to see the first half of this film last weekend. I had seen the last half at Mike Z's several months ago, before going to Ellum. Suffice it to say, I did not get the whole effect of the film until I had seen the whole thing. I got the main idea of Derek's rehabilitation, but I had no idea how far he had to go to rehabilitate...

11
Feb
2000

Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels

Posted by knobbygirl

I was the last person on earth to see this film, but I finally did. Early, early - one Thursday morning in November, I awoke to watch it. The Blockbuster Fairy did good this time.

I am quick to understand the most bizarre of Limey accents, but this film was one step away from Riff Raff, a film with British accents so unintelligable that it required subtitles. I didn't have much of a problem understanding it though, besides, I had a translator with me who had seen it at least 20 times.

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