Seed of Chucky
As we were sitting in the dark, waiting for the previews to begin, I was put in the position of rationalizing why I felt it was necessary to go see Seed of Chucky on opening weekend. I tried to explain what a big deal it was - that it was like Lord of the Rings. My husband said that was the "most asinine thing I have ever heard you say." (Not as big an insult as you would think - he says that to me all the time. What can I say? I sometimes tend towards the asinine.) I then changed tack slightly to say that I wanted Seed of Chucky to outgross Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason. Yeah...he laughed at me - but who has the last laugh NOW? Chucky grossed $8,774,520, while Bridget only grossed $8,684,055. In your face, Renee Zellwuhuzajigger! You got served by a KILLER DOLL!
Seed of Chucky lived up to my expectations and more. Picking up 5 years after Bride of Chucky, we find that the "baby" Tiffany shat out was rescued and taken to Merry Old England to perform as a ventriloquist's dummy in a freak show. (I guess that was the best way to explain why Shithead sounds like a British Hobbit?) After seeing "Chucky" and "Tiffany" on TV promoting their new film, Shithead realizes that they must be his parents, escapes and mails himself to Hollywood, where he brings them back to life. Then the fun begins...
As with most dolls, the Seed of Chucky AKA Shithead is not anatomically correct. This leads to some interesting 'Glen or Glenda' scenes - Ed Wood would have been proud, as would Norman Bates. (As a matter of fact, why DO Chucky and Tiffany have genitals, anyway? Did they add an extra verse to the voodoo spell to ensure genitalia? Surely, the Good Guys dolls were not manufactured with a penis?)
Although the genitalia question remains unanswered, many other questions are answered by the end of this film. What reading material does Chucky prefer as a spank aid? Fangoria, of course. What is the average duration of a Voodoo Pregnancy? 2 days, give or take. (I missed the boat on that one, let me tell you.) Does Britney Spears appear in this film? No, but the explosion of the Britney lookalike is just as satisfying. Wouldn't it be hilarious to see a killer doll do Kung Fu? Yes, it definitely is hilarious.
Oh yeah, I almost forgot to mention - JOHN WATERS! John Waters plays a slimy tabloid photographer who meets a gruesome end. This is me squeeing with delight!
Although wrapping up nicely, just enough room is left in the ending to justify another sequel. I'll be sad indeed if it takes another six years to make it to the screen.