March 11, 2011
I was nervous as the film started to play…am I about to see a gritty, exciting update to one of my favorite childhood films? Or is my childhood about to be shit all over? Ultimately, the answer wasn’t clear. There were things I loved AND things I hated about the remake.
What did I LOVE about the remake? I LOVED Liam Neeson as Zeus. I LOVED Neeson and Ralph Fiennes playing brothers, because I used to get them confused back in the 90s. I LOVED Beebo’s cameo – it was lame, but still cool. I LOVED Black Pegasus. Black Pegasus should get his own spin-off.
What did I HATE about the remake? I HATED how far the film strayed from traditional Greek Mythology. True, the original Clash of the Titans played fast and loose with the Perseus story – the Kraken was totally stolen from Norse mythology and what was up with Calibos? Even so, the remake hardly made any sense at all. [Spoiler Warning] I HATED the ending. Why didn’t Perseus end up living happily ever after with Andromeda? Wasn’t Perseus a descendant of Io? It’s Kate and Leopold all over again…gross! I HATED Medusa. The CGI implementation was weak at best. I HATED Perseus’ hair. Why did he have closely cropped hair, while EVERY single other male in the film looked like Jesus? How did he shave every day? I HATED…oh Hell, I guess I did HATE this movie more than I LOVED it.
So there’s a sequel coming out called Wrath of the Titans. I don’t know what it’s about, something totally made up probably – I can’t wait to see it!
Rating – PG-13
Runtime – 106 minutes
Genre – Shitty Remake
Director(s) – Louis Leterrier
Writer(s) – Travis Beacham, Phil Hay
Actor(s) – Sam Worthington, Liam Neeson, Ralph Fiennes, Gemma Arterton, Jason Flemyng
BOB Rating – Two BOBs
Favorite Quote – "Release the Kraken!" - Zeus (Liam Neeson)