July 1, 2018
I’ve never tried so hard to NOT watch a movie. I played games on my phone, ate cinnamon toast, took a dump…yet I still ended up watching too much of this abysmal film.
They thought they were starting a Universal Monsters extended Film Universe…but they led with the wrong monster! Russell Crowe as Dr. Jekyll was the only watchable part of this whole mess. If they had led with Dr. Jekyll, maybe this whole thing could’ve worked.
It wasn’t empowerment – the only reason they made the Mummy a woman was so that they could dress a model in a skimpy mummy outfit.
Oh the good old double-double cross – ugh, I’m so tired of seeing this tired old trope. Also tired of the dead comrade moving the plot along trope – see American Werewolf in London and Pet Sematery. That’s really what’s wrong with the film – it’s all cliches, nothing fresh at all. Ugh, so bad.
Rating – PG-13
Runtime – 110 minutes
Genre – Universal Monsters Remake
Director(s) – Alex Kurtzman
Writer(s) – David Koepp, Christopher McQuarrie, Dylan Kussman
Actor(s) – Tom Cruise, Russell Crowe, Annabelle Wallis, Sofia Boutella, Jake Johnson
BOB Rating – One BOB
Favorite Quote – "There are worse fates than death." - Ahmanet (Sofia Boutella)